Qualities of a Wife

[1] Men want 3 qualities in wives: Frugal in kitchen, artist in home & devil
in bed. But they get artist in kitchen, devil in home & Frugal in Bed.

[2] Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

[3] Before marriage: Roses are red, sky is blue. You are beautiful, and I love
you.
After marriage: Roses are dead, I'm blue. You are my headache, and one day
I will kill you.

[4] Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You
order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish
you had ordered that.

[5] Man:Is there any way for long life?
Dr:Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

[6] Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight
begins!

[7] Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[8] They say that marriage makes a man dizzy, and it's true. As soon as I got
a wife, I lost my balance at the bank.